27 Jul ¨I Need To Do Some Research On Psychopaths For A Situation That I´m Currently In¨, I speak to my videotelepathy device. It replies in it´s robot voice, ¨take a left at the stop sign. Your destination will be straight ahead, Yo.¨ I sigh, Yo. (2.1k)
¨So that doesn´t help the current situation¨, I say to HR as Jacobate´s fist goes through the door at the top of the stairs.
¨Robot voice–I have a corpse trying to murder me. How do I stop it
5 Traits of Actual Psychopaths
Hollywood often portrays psychopaths as serial killers, but not all psychopaths are that evil. Many exhibit psychopathic traits to a much lesser degree. In fact, you’ve likely encountered a few psychopaths, who are actually relatively common in the corporate world.
While about one percent of the general population exhibits psychopathic traits, about three percent of business leaders scored in the psychopathic range in a 2010 study in Behavioral Sciences & the Law. (By comparison, about 15 percent of the U.S. prison population meet the criteria for being psychopaths.)
Before you can spot a psychopath, you have to understand what that really means. Psychopath isn’t an actual medical diagnosis. Psychopaths and sociopaths fall under the diagnosis of antisocial personality disorder, which may stem from a variety of genetic and environmental factors. Far more men than women meet the criteria. Symptoms tend to peak during the early 20s and sometimes recede on their own during one’s 40s.
Psychopaths aren’t always easy to spot, and they’re often quite likable—at least initially. But over time, their true nature becomes increasingly apparent.
Here are five things psychopaths do:
1. They’re extremely charming.
Psychopaths are almost always well-liked. They come across as delightful people great at making small talk. Their quick wit tends to draw people to them. They usually have interesting stories as well. Their convincing tales portray them in a favorable, yet believable light. People walk away from conversations with a psychopath feeling pretty good.
2. They don’t experience remorse.
A lack of guilt might be the first red flag that signals someone might be a psychopath. Psychopaths aren’t capable of feeling any genuine remorse. They don’t accept any responsibility for hurting other people’s feelings. Instead, they blame other people and deny responsibility. A psychopath may say that someone “deserved” to be treated poorly. Or, they may shrug off reports that they offended someone by saying, “She needs to be less sensitive,” or “I guess he can’t handle the truth.”
3. They’re really arrogant.
Psychopaths have an inflated sense of importance. Much like narcissists, they think the usual rules don’t apply to them. They also tend to have grandiose ideas about their potential. They believe they deserve to be the CEO, or they’re convinced they’re the best at everything they do.
4. They take big risks.
Psychopaths have little regard for safety, especially other people’s.
The Hidden Suffering of the Psychopath
Psychopathy is characterized by diagnostic features such as superficial charm, high intelligence, poor judgment and failure to learn from experience, pathological egocentricity and incapacity for love, lack of remorse or shame, impulsivity, grandiose sense of self-worth, pathological lying, manipulative behavior, poor self-control, promiscuous sexual behavior, juvenile delinquency, and criminal versatility, among others. As a consequence of these criteria, the image of the psychopath is that of a cold, heartless, inhuman being. But do all psychopaths show a complete lack of normal emotional capacities and empathy?
Like healthy people, many psychopaths love their parents, spouse, children, and pets in their own way, but they have difficulty in loving and trusting the rest of the world. Furthermore, psychopaths suffer emotionally as a consequence of separation, divorce, death of a beloved person, or dissatisfaction with their own deviant behavior.
Sources of sadness
Psychopaths can suffer emotional pain for a variety of reasons. As with anyone else, psychopaths have a deep wish to be loved and cared for. This desire remains frequently unfulfilled, however, because it is obviously not easy for another person to get close to someone with such repellent personality characteristics. Psychopaths are at least periodically aware of the effects of their behavior on others and can be genuinely saddened by their inability to control it. The lives of most psychopaths are devoid of a stable social network or warm, close bonds.
The life histories of psychopaths are often characterized by a chaotic family life, lack of parental attention and guidance, parental substance abuse and antisocial behavior, poor relationships, divorce, and adverse neighborhoods.4 These persons may feel that they are prisoners of their own etiological determination and believe that they had, in comparison with normal people, fewer opportunities or advantages in life.
Despite their outward arrogance, psychopaths feel inferior to others and know they are stigmatized by their own behavior. Some psychopaths are superficially adapted to their environment and are even popular, but they feel they must carefully hide their true nature because it will not be acceptable to others. This leaves psychopaths with a difficult choice: adapt and participate in an empty, unreal life, or do not adapt and live a lonely life isolated from the social community. They see the love and friendship others share and feel dejected knowing they will never be part of it.
Psychopaths are known for needing excessive stimulation, but most foolhardy adventures only end in disillusionment because of conflicts with others and unrealistic expectations. Furthermore, many psychopaths are disheartened by their inability to control their sensation-seeking and are repeatedly confronted with their weaknesses. Although they may attempt to change, low fear response and associated inability to learn from experiences lead to repeated negative, frustrating, and depressing confrontations, including trouble with the justice system.
As psychopaths age, they are not able to continue their energy-consuming lifestyle and become burned-out and depressed while they look back on their restless life full of interpersonal discontentment. Their health deteriorates as the effects of their recklessness accumulate.
Ultimately they reach a point of no return, where they feel they have cut through the last thin connection with the normal world
Hidden suffering, loneliness, and lack of self-esteem are risk factors for violent, criminal behavior in psychopaths
Emotional pain and violence
Social isolation, loneliness, and associated emotional pain in psychopaths may precede violent criminal acts.5 They believe that the whole world is against them and eventually become convinced that they deserve special privileges or rights to satisfy their desires. As psychopathic serial killers Jeffrey Dahmer and Dennis Nilsen expressed, violent psychopaths ultimately reach a point of no return, where they feel they have cut through the last thin connection with the normal world. Subsequently, their sadness and suffering increase, and their crimes become more and more bizarre.6
Dahmer and Nilsen have stated that they killed simply for company.5 Both men had no friends and their only social contacts were occasional encounters in homosexual bars. Nilsen watched television and talked for hours with the dead bodies of his victims; Dahmer consumed parts of his victims’ bodies in order to become one with them: he believed that in this way his victims lived further in his body.6
For the rest of us, it is unimaginable that these men were so lonely—yet they describe their loneliness and social failures as unbearably painful.
Giving Ourselves Permission To Feel Again
“One’s suffering disappears when one lets oneself go, when one yields — even to sadness”
-Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
Imagine Main Street if we didn’t rein in our emotions. Rude comments tossed at a passersby who fails to meet our unrefined aesthetic sensibilities; obscenities running wild each time our expectations are frustrated; an uninvited growl and then a leap at a sexual object walking past. The rules of the jungle — the product of impulse, impatience, and untamed power — would launch a hostile take-over of our concrete jungles. Fortunately, we learn to suppress our base instincts, to civilize our uncivilized urges — to hide our raw feelings and tame the ignoble savage.
Social ties would not hold, things would fall apart, if our emotions were always exposed. For who among us has not had an indecent feeling toward our colleague or best friend, that, if revealed, would endanger a partnership or relationship? Have we not all, in our minds and hearts, transgressed, violated in our imagination the most sacred commandments that hold our society intact — lusted after our neighbor’s partner, felt enraged enough to hurt another? So we become socialized and learn to impose emotion controls, issue restraining orders on our feelings. There are clear benefits to concealing some emotions, but there are also costs: like most human interventions with nature, the socialization process produces side effects.
While it’s at times necessary to keep certain emotions out of sight (when we’re on the street), it’s harmful to try to keep them out of mind (when we are alone). Holding ourselves to the same standards in solitude, denying ourselves the permission to experience unwanted emotions or feel indecent feelings when we are alone, is potentially harmful to our well-being.
We are told that it is “improper” to display our anxiety when listening to a lecture, so we suppress any form of anxiety when we’re writing in our journal. We learn that it is indecent to cry while sitting in a streetcar, and so we hold in our tears even when we are in the shower. Anger does not win us friends, and over time we lose our ability to express anger in solitude. We extinguish our anxiety, fear, and anger for the sake of being pleasant, nice to be around — and in the process of getting others to accept us, we reject ourselves.
When we keep emotions in — when we suppress or repress, ignore or avoid — we pay a high price. Much has been written about the cost of suppression to our psychological well-being. Sigmund Freud and his followers have established the connection between repression and unhappiness; eminent psychologists like Nathaniel Branden and Carl Rogers have illustrated how we hurt our self-esteem when we deny our feelings. And it is not only our psychological well-being that is influenced by our emotions, but our physical well-being as well. Since emotions are both cognitive and physical — affecting and being affected by our thoughts and physiology — suppressing emotions influences the mind and the body.
The link between the mind and the body in the field of medicine has been well established — from the placebo effect to the evidence tying stress and suppression with physical aches and pains. According to Dr. John Sarno, a physician and a professor at New York University School of Medicine, back pain, carpal tunnel syndrome, headaches, and other symptoms are often “a response to the need to keep those terrible, antisocial, unkind, childish, angry, selfish feelings . . . from becoming conscious.” Because there is less of a stigmain our culture against physical pain than against emotional dis-ease, our subconscious mind diverts attention — our own and others’ — from the emotional to the physical.
The prescription Sarno offers to thousands of his patients is to acknowledge their negative feelings, to accept their anxiety, anger, fear, jealousy, or confusion. In many of the cases, the mere permission to experience one’s emotions does not only make the physical symptom go away, it alleviates the negative feelings as well.
Psychotherapy works because the client allows the free flow of emotions — positive and negative.
The robot voice speaks as Heatherate´s arm crashes through the door. Jacobate has a leg in the space.
Don´t Forget Your Roots.
¨What are you saying, robot voice¨, I ask.
Go to the roof.
¨Ah!¨, I reply as I turn towards the window, ¨let´s get out of this place, HR!¨
HR opens the window. We leave the small upper room at the top of the stairs and are on the roof.
This buys us some time, I think to HR and my wife but still wonder, but, still where do we go from here.
I´ll be there shortly, my wife thinks back to me, just hold on, and you and HR stay safe.
These situations happened frequently in this sanctuary city. People knew the protocol. Soon my wife would be here and it would be ok. Soon, also Heatherate and Jacobate would get through the glass window and join us on the roof. My foot was still mangled. Blood still left a trail where I walked, I had made a path for them to know where I was. My mistake had been reanimating myself in a new body. My mistake had not been a mistake, instead we had calculated the different scenarios–this was our chance.
Could we find a way to cure the illness that threatened our immortal life.